Wednesday, April 1, 2009

5 DEFINITE NO-WIN QUESTIONS FOR A MAN ;-)

I READ A SIMILAR ARTICLE IN A MAGAZINE AND INNOVATED AND IMPROVIZED ON IT TO MAKE THIS FINAL LAYOUT HERE FOR MY BLOG.....
so i'll say this article is not entirely my original...!!! the idea is borrowed but the questions and answers are mine after a little innovation i put in.. ;-) ENNJJJOOOIIIIII :)

The 5 toughest questions for men are:

1. What are you thinking about?
2. Do you love me?
3. Do I look fat?
4. Do you think she is prettier than me?
5. What would you do if I died?

What makes these questions so difficult is that each one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly ( i.e. tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses.

Question 1: What are you thinking about?

The proper answer to this, of course, is: “I’m sorry if I’ve been pensive, dear. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you.”

This response obviously bears no resemblance to the true answer, which most likely is one of the following:

a. Baseball.
b. Football.
c. How fat you are.
d. How much prettier she is than you.
e. How I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question 2: Do you love me?

The proper response is: “YES!” or, if you feel a more detailed answer is in order, “Yes, dear.”

Inappropriate responses include:

a. Oh Yeah, shit loads.
b. Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
c. That depends on what you mean by love.
d. Does it matter?
e. Who, me?

Question 3: Do I look fat?

The correct answer is an emphatic: “Of course not!”

Among the incorrect answers are:

a. Compared to what?
b. I wouldn’t call you fat, but you’re not exactly thin.
c. A little extra weight looks good on you.
d. I’ve seen fatter.
e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question 4: Do you think she’s prettier than me?

Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: “Of course not!”

Incorrect responses include:

a. Yes, but you have a better personality.
b. Not prettier, but definitely thinner.
c. Not as pretty as you when you were her age.
d. Define pretty..
e. Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question 5: What would you do if I died?

A definite no-win question.

(The real answer, of course, is “Buy a Corvette!"... "i'll try angelina jolie”.... or even "i'll holiday in amsterdam with the insurance money") ;-)

3 comments:

ritika singh said...

oh all men are just the same. DOGS. lolz. NO-OFFENCE PLEASE. am just joking. but it was real fun to read this post of urs. apt for the april-fool day. hahha

by-the-way, who is the girl u love hunh for whom u write poems? i'll ask her to ask u these questions. let's see what will ur answers be in real life scenario.

and am looking forward to have many such funny articles from u along with the lovely poems u write

mayank puri said...

hehe. its ok rits. :-) i took that as a joke. vaise bhi women are just the same species as men ;-) lolz. anyways, i think i'll also give the same answers as in this blog just like any woman-fearing man would.. hehehe

maddy said...

hahhahaha. i loved this one. now this post shows that you have a great sense of humour alongside that deeply emotional and sensitively romantic side of yours. laughed my hearts out reading this post. its superb